77 Clean Jokes That Are Appropriate for Work and Kids

Daftar Isi

The main idea is that you can still make people laugh without putting your marriage, job, or overall well-being at risk.

The truth can also be shared safely with people from age 9 to 90 without worrying about it being too complicated or shocking; you just might have to explain to kids and seniors that Snoop Dogg is a popular cultural icon known for Olympic sports, not athletes participating in the actual Olympics.

Clean Work Jokes

• What do dentist call X-rays? Tooth pictures.
• Servers with one leg work at IHOP.
• Here's how NASA plans a party - they space out the details.
• What did the janitor shout out of the closet? Supplies!!
• How do scientists purify their breath? Experi-mints.
• Why don't scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
• When giving feedback to your superior, it's usually advisable to refrain from speaking very softly.
• What do you call a magician who has lost his magic? A janitor.

Clean Animal Jokes

• How do you measure a snake? In inches, since they don't have feet to measure in feet.
• What's the difference between a hippo and a lighter, or what people sometimes call a zippo? Well actually, one is really heavy, and the other is actually pretty light.
• What do you call a toothless bear? A gummy bear.
• What do you call a pig that's a champion in karate? A pork chop.
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish.
• What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador.
• What did the bison say when his calf went to prestudies? Bison.

Clean Punny Jokes

• What makes a joke a "dad joke"? It becomes noticeable when it does.
• The term "Dark Ages" seems mysterious. You would think it's called that because of the presence of knights.
• What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? The man's clothes.
• I lay awake one night thinking about where the sun was. Suddenly it became clear to me.
• What do you call fake spaghetti? Impasta.
• Why did the cowboy get a dachshund? He wanted a long little puppy.
• Why are crabs so reluctant to share? They're a type of crustacean.
• I attempted to capture the fog. A cloud rolled in.
• Why did the banana skip school? It wasn’t feeling well.
• Why did the phantom seek help and treatment? He was hooked on booing.
• To locate Will Smith in the snow, try finding fresh footprints.
• Where do defective rainbows go? The speculum is where they serve a disciplinary purpose.
• What happens when a frog's vehicle breaks down? It gets stranded.

Clean Silly Jokes

• Why did the ocean wave hello to the other ocean? It was a silent gesture.
• What's the best thing about Switzerland? No idea, but their flag is definitely a bonus.
• Why hasn't Dracula gotten married? He's a real thorn in people's sides.
• Would you like to hear a joke about the roof? The first one is on the house!
• Why don't teddy bears eat snacks? They're always already full since they're stuffed.
• A customer walked into the ice cream shop and asked the sales associate, "Give me one that makes me one with everything."
• I attempted to enter a contest to win a tan. Instead, I ended up with a bronze color.
• What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent and Nickelback.
• Why did the skeleton miss the dance? He didn't have a body to go with.
• Where do snowy statues get loans? Snowmountains.
• Why won't skeletons fight? They don't have any guts.
• Why was the belt arrested? It had been charged for aiding in the display of a pair of underwear.
• What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle.
• Why was Cinderella kicked off her soccer team? She was always running from the responsibility of being part of the team and playing the game.
• Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
• The car got a flat tire because there was a fork in the road that presumably caused one of the tires to go off course and suffer a puncture.
• What kept the can crusher from his job was the crushing pressure of the soda business.
• Why did the donut go to the dentist? To get a cavity filled.
• What does a vegan zombie want to eat? Braaaaains - but not just any braaaaains, all organic non-cruelty-free brains, preferably locally sourced and hormone-free.
• What is said by the full glass to the empty glass? You must be spilled.
• What's something that's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
• Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? For light drizzle.
• What do you call Batman when he skips work—or rather, skips out? Christian Bale.
• Two radio antennas decided to get hitched. The wedding ceremony was just okay, but the after-party was truly exceptional!

• I had to stay home from work because I'm experiencing vision issues today and it wouldn't be safe to work at the office.
• What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? Ah, dear matey.
• The difference between in-laws and outlaws is that outlaws are considered fugitives with active arrest warrants, while in-laws are the spouse's relatives.
• What's brown and sticky? A stick.
• What do you call Batman and Robin when they get wiped out? Flatman and Ribbon.
• What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
• I'm reading a book about anti-gravity - it's absolutely captivating, I just can't stop reading it.
• Did you hear the story about the astronaut who left his wife? He was in search of some space.
• Everybody was very emotional at the wedding and the cake was stacked in layers.
• The leading cause of dry skin is what is often said to be towels.
• Why are skeletons so peaceful? Nothing seems to ruffle their nerves.
• I disposed of some old batteries this morning and gave them away for no cost.
• Active and energetic breeds make the best car racers.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was a tense situation.
• What seems peculiar? Every other number.
• People are amazed by dry erase boards because they're truly remarkable.
• Mistakes are made by people. Blaming others is what managers do.
• What's the difference between not knowing and not caring? Don't know and don't care.
• Why do ghosts haunt elevators? They boost their morale.
• I've heard some whispers about butter. I shouldn't probably be sharing this, but...
• I got rid of my vacuum cleaner; it was basically just gathering dust.
• Thinking of purchasing large quantities of chicken broth? Consider the stock market.
• No matter how much you participate in paperwork, it will always be something that doesn't move.
• What do you do if you get the flu caused by birds? Seek medical treatment.
• It's difficult to convey information to individuals with kleptomania. They constantly interpret things in a literal sense.